Thursday, May 19, 2016

A weird feeling

I think I've reached a stage in my personal and professional life that I just want to walk away from everything. It feels like an utterly lonely place I've reached. I had dinner with my OM today and I shared how I've reached a point where I feel like I have to become a cold and heartless person to survive... and that scares me because it's totally not who I am naturally.

Did I overshare?

I'm tired of fighting and feeling lonely at the same time. Leadership is lonely. I'd really rather just go out and be a nameless waitress or something like that. Or some...road sweeper, or random teacher or something. I don't want anyone to know who I am, what I do, what I've done in my life... Is that weird? I just want to wake up, go to some job under some pseudo name, and just serve people one at a time.

I think I'm just generally frustrated that I feel like I'm going nowhere. And that I'm alone.
It's a weird feeling.

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