Monday, August 04, 2014

Day 46: My first Official Post-Op Profile Comparison Shots

Pain Level: 1 - Small electrocutey feelings that come and go again in my chin. I really don't mind these though, as long as it means that my nerves are coming back to life! I really don't want to be stuck with a numb lower lip and chin.
Swelling: Still there I think, though everyone has been saying it's been going down.
Sleep last night: Pretty good. Didn't feel like enough though.
Other weirdness: My teeth and jaws feel weird and sensitive especially when I try to bite together. It almost feels like some of my teeth are loose and it freaks me out quite a bit. My bottom lip and chin are still numb. AND I put on 2kilos in a week! OMG! 
Mood: Tired and stressed.

Eating patterns today weren't too good, I felt especially terrible after a curry puff at lunch. My whole throat became dry and uncomfortable. I think it was something they put in it. My body absolutely cannot tolerate MSG or processed foods now. :/ Either that or it was the nutella. I need to stop indulging in nutella. :/

I had one dizzy spell again today... that surprised me because I've been taking iron supplements. :( Not to mention that I've been eating SO much (to the point that I've put on weight)... so it really can't be my nutrition. Maybe it's my poor sleeping patterns.

Today's happy lunch of
Herb-smoked Salmon
with a triangle of cream cheese
and a dash of paprika. :)
Ergh! I really dislike it when I write depressing sounding-ish posts! Okay, I need to discuss something positive! 

I didn't break any bands (elastics) today! I kinda failed trying to transit back to my syringe... though I did use it once or twice today. It's just somehow a lot faster to eat via my tiny spoon now. #^_^# Also I think I'm starting to find it a joy to upload food photos to my IG account...there's just something about creating delicious meals that I find some pleasure in. Tomorrow, I'm going to make a pesto baked salmon. :)

As I approach Day 50 post op, I've decided that I should just go ahead and upload progress pictures whilst I'm at it... Parts of me kinda misses my "old face", but I think I'm slowly accepting that the surgery needed to be done and I just need to accept where I'm at now. It's a little tiring getting through the entire story repeatedly with people I meet nowadays.... about my dentist telling me to get x-rays - discovering my crazy jaws-shock about arthiritis and jaw joints being worn out - having to choose between doing it now or later (where bone healing may be much slower and there may be more issues). And worse still when they direct the conversation into plastic surgery and stuff like that after that. But hey, at least I know my heart was in the right place and it was a totally rational decision to get it done. And considering how major it was (I recently stumbled upon a live jaw surgery video which shocked the heck out of me. Please do not click into the link if you're faint-hearted), I'm actually really proud of how brave I was to go through with it.

So, for the first time finally after my surgery...this is me now...
Still can't quite smile properly as my cheeks are still swollen and I don't quite have full control of my face yet.
There are two groups of people's' opinions with regards to my face - people who think I look the same/not very different, and people who can't recognize me anymore. It's weird, and judging by the varied reactions of people as well as my day-to-day uncertainty of how I look, I cannot quite be certain if I really look very different. I think I've given up trying to figure that out.
I kinda miss my older stronger/more-defined jaw.
The first time I saw my new side profile, I felt completely like an alien. I didn't like anything - from my missing jaw line, to my upturned nose, to (what looked to me at that time) what looked like an overbite.
I've learned to accept it over time... and I can't wait for more of the swelling to go. Maybe my jawline will come back then.
Can't believe how bad my teeth were at the start...
I miss the longer tapering of my face, but I trust my surgeon did what was necessary for me to right my jaw.

Food Report

Breakfast
2 tbspn smooth peanut butter with black sesame and almond milk (Apparently peanuts are not paleo so I'm going to stop eating PB after this... I'm not that big a fan anyway)
Supplements: HiOmega3, CalcD, Vitamin B

Lunch
Herb Smoked Salmon with Cream Cheese and Paprika
2 little white rabbit custard paus
1/2 Old Chang Kee curry puff (Without the crust, but this was so bad for me. :()
Some nutella, no more than a tablespoon, or two teaspoons I think.
Supplements: Redoxon+Zinc, Floron Iron Tablet

Dinner
3 bowls of seaweed and egg soup
Little bits of fish and vegetables 
1.5 cups of rock melon juice
3 tbspns Nutella with Almond Butter and Unsweetened Almondmilk (stress eating. :()
Supplements: HiOmega3, CalcD

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