Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Day 5: A bad night of sleep.

Pain Level: 2.5 - Could somehow feel the healing in my jaws last night and they still feel a bit raw this morning... I think it might have been the ginger tea. (Noo....I thought it was was secret formula!)
Mood: Still a little low because of the thoughts of having to take the disgusting meds. :(
Sleep: Really disrupted. :(

Had a pretty terrible night of sleep yesterday.

I don't know if it's because of the three hour nap I took at 5pm, or the ginger tea, or the fact that I "ate" pretty late, but I couldn't sleep till 1am. And woke up at 2ish. And again at 5ish.

Somehow, last night I could almost feel the healing happening in my jaws. I could almost feel where the incisions were and all the work my body was doing whilst I was lying in bed. I was both terrified and amazed at the same time. It was pretty achy, but not really painful-painful.

I had a lot of weird thoughts go through my head last night too... about why I did this and whether it was the right choice, and whether I'm going to have problems in the future and regret this for life. It was a whole lot of thoughts just attacking me.

I don't know about you, but I sometimes have conversations with God, and last night was one of them. Last night was about being thankful for all the healing that my body could do by itself. Even surgeons can't beat the work the body does naturally. Imagine... with all the cuts, and sawed off bone, and plates and screws.... the body just finds a way to restore itself back. It's God's amazing way of making me whole again. I just lay there thanking God for a while. 

We did talk about other things... but yeah, I wasn't quite ready to hear all of it.

I woke up about half past 9 this morning... and I'm totally not looking forward to my meds again. It's really the worst part of my day. :( Can't wait for these two weeks to be over. I think I should really start planning my days so that I actually have plans I can think about rather than focusing on the negative thoughts of the gross meds.

Also, I'm currently having a runny nose. I wonder if it's because of all the cold water I'm drinking. It's a really bad thing to develop a flu/cold at this time yeah? :( God, please help me keep all the sickies at bay! I really need to heal up from this now... 

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